Contentment in Life

Last night as I laid awake with legs aching and a 6 month pregnant tummy that does not allow me to find very comfortable positions, listening to the deep breaths of Gary sleeping soundly and the monitor whirling; I couldn't help but think about how far we have come.

We have been married over 3 years, Lilly is now 2 and Cadi is expected to arrive early October. I am grateful to the Lord for his many blessings on our life, my life.

This time 4 years ago I was searching for contentment in being single. I was 28 years old, never been in a relationship and now I was on the Mission field working with children. I assumed that these children were the children that I had prayed for, and I loved and still do love them. I felt like Esther in the Sara Groves song

Along with a lifetime, Africa called
She went for the first time, it grew in her heart
All of the children, so many children

Now Esther has 2.4 million children
She writes us and asks us to pray for them all

 I was sure God had called me to life of singleness. Even though a friendship was blooming with a South African Guy, I tried hard to not think anything of it; I mean I have had LOTS of friendships with Guys that was just that friendships. RIGHT?  I was so wrong. Gary was not just another Guy, he was the GUY that I had been praying for since high School.

In 2001, at my brothers Rehearsal Dinner, my sister-in-laws dad told Mary that the day she was born they started praying for her husband.  I took that to heart and started praying for the man that Lord had put on earth for me. Little did I know that that man was half way across the world and a new believer at that time.

God raised Gary up to be a godly man.  And I am grateful to the Almighty that he has blessed me with such a man. I am not saying that these 3 years have been easy. They have no, but they have been great.  I do understand why divorce rates are as high as they are, but within our selfishness and sin if we do not love the other more than ourselves then a marriage will fall apart ( 1 Corinthians 13). We have had our fights, but by Gods grace we work through them…with lots of tears (mostly on my part) and yelling and fighting for our marriage. When you put 2 sinners under one roof it can be hard. But you have to be willing to work through the issues.  

Communication is what we have found to be key to keeping up together. We highly recommend for any couple getting engaged or courting the book “No Longer 2”. It helped Gary and I learn to talk to one another and be open and honest about stuff, even if it might hurt the other. Often we think that we are communicating, but men and women communicate so differently, so it is helpful to learn how to make sure you understand the other. I often hear my sister and her husband say to one another “What I hear you saying is this…” I think that is Key, to make sure you understand. Gary and I have had conversations where we have to say, “I don’t understand” to where the other has to explain his/her side once again, or until both are on the same page.

Marriage is hard, But wonderful all at the same time.  I am grateful for my husband and my little family, but singleness was also great. Where I now have to think about 2 other people in my decisions, I use only have to think about myself.

 I highly recommend for those girls who desire a husband, but still haven’t met their prince read the book “Lady in Waiting”. It’s about finding contentment in singleness and having a deeper stronger relationship with the Lord and how it is more important than finding a husband. And if it is HIS desire he will bring that one in your life when time the time is right.

No matter if you are single or you are married, being content is Key. As a wife don't put your husband before GOD, but if you are single do not put the ideal of a spouse so HIGH up that you also neglect to put GOD first in your life.